Colbert Doesn't Hold Back on Trump and Epstein

Stephen Colbert isn't feeling any sympathy for himself, now that his show is headed off the air, nor for his favorite punching bag, President Trump, still neck-deep in controversy over his relationship with Jeffrey Epstein. "It's a great day to be me because I'm not Donald Trump," the Late Show host said Tuesday to kick off a monologue in which he "goes scorched earth on Trump and Epstein for 8 full minutes," Mashable reports. Key lines:

• "According to court records, Trump flew on Epstein's plane at least seven times. Now, that doesn't mean he did anything illegal, but it's not a great look when you fly on the pedophile's plane enough times to earn 'Diamond Pervert' status," Colbert said.
• "All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't hide who Dumpty humped with his friend," Colbert added in response to reports claiming FBI personnel were told to search the Epstein files and flag mentions of Trump.

• Colbert then aired a clip of Trump claiming former President Obama was "sedatious"—as opposed to seditious—and "trying to lead a coup." "I mean, it takes extraordinary confidence to call a former president 'sedatious,' because that is not a word," Colbert noted.
• Colbert also aired a 2006 clip in which Trump spoke of his relations with women, saying, "No, I have no age ... I mean, I have age limit," before adding he didn't want to be with "12-year-olds." "That is one of those questions where you don't want to leave any ambiguity. 'Sir, would you ever have sex with an animal?' 'Certainly not a horse! Good day,'" Colbert quipped.