Surefire Signs of a 'Performative Male'

Does this sound like you or someone you know? Picture this: a man in wired headphones sipping iced matcha and thumbing through classic feminist literature with a tote bag slung over his shoulder—maybe with a stuffed Labubu clipped to the side. If so, we're not making any allegations here, but the New York Times thinks that sounds an awful lot like the internet's latest archetype: the "performative male." The meme has become shorthand for a certain kind of curated softness, a way of signaling progressive values that doesn't always ring authentic. And, online, the performative male has become unavoidable.

Related TikTok videos tagged have racked up more than 28 million views, while Google searches have spiked with questions like "Why is matcha performative?" The vibe has become so widespread that offline contests are popping up. Earlier this month in Seattle's Capitol Hill, men paraded tote bags, vinyl records, and ironic mustaches while stumbling through feminist trivia, all for a chance to win a copy of The Will to Change by bell hooks. "It's men who are trying to cater to what they think women who are feminist like," said Guinevere Unterbrink, a teacher and host of the contest. Similar events have been staged in New York and Jakarta, while another took place Friday in San Francisco, reports the San Francisco Chronicle. The 24-year-old winner of that contest defined the archetype as "trying to get feminist-encoded stuff to not seem so macho."

Still, the joke has teeth—and self-awareness. Some men now post exaggerated videos of themselves with upside-down novels or juggling multiple tote bags to lean into the meme. It's parody, but also protection. If accused of faking it, they can always shrug it off as irony. For some cultural forecasters, that's the real story: The line between sincerity and performance keeps blurring. "It almost provides this level of armor where the guy could be like, 'Oh, I'm just being ironic, don't take it too seriously,'" said Tony Wang, founder of a trend forecast firm. But to some, whatever the performative male is, it's just the worst. "It reminds me very much of being a poser" in the 1990s and early 2000s, said Casey Lewis, founder of After School, which highlights Gen Z and internet culture. "There's really nothing worse one can be than a poser."